Abuse.

No one should ever have to live in fear of the person they love. 

.     This is the phrase that really hits home for me. Because it's true. More so for anyone who has had the experience. According to some random statistic I found online, and am oddly inclined to believe: 50% of women will experience some form of domestic abuse or domestic violence. This number is scary because it's high, sure, but it's terrorizing because I have a feeling it's true.
.     Ok, trip back to health class. Remember there were seven major forms of abuse: physical, sexual, emotional, economic, psychological, cultural and cohersive control I believe we're the categories. I'm not going to bore you with what each entails, but the gist is that one person exerts control over another in whatever way they can. And no matter the method the result is painful and traumatic.
.     Many people don't recognize the signs of an abuse victim, sometimes the cry for help manifests in such a way that the victim seems normal, happy, or perfect. It isn't very uncommon for these types of situations to include some level of threat against anyone finding out. For fear of the abuse getting worse, the victim might sometimes go out of their way to make things seem fine. What's worse is, given time, it's not like things get better either way.
.     Abuse is a pattern like alcoholism or other accepted forms of wrong turn life styles. And like these other forms of wrong choice life styles, it is important to be supportive of those seeking help. Whether it is a victim looking to break the pattern of living with abusive types or abusive types looking to break the pattern of thinking that makes the abusing seem like the right decision at the time. 
.     To quote domesticviolence.org: Abusers often have low self-esteem. They do not take responsibility for their actions. They may even blame the victim for causing the violence. In most cases, men abuse female victims. It is important to remember that women can also be abusers and men can be victims. But it happens too often to be ignored and people both good and bad deserve to be encouraged to break negative patterns.
.     Look out for these signs of abuse:
People who are being abused might:

Seem afraid or anxious to please their partner.
Go along with everything their partner says and does.
Check in often with their partner to report where they are and what they’re doing.
Receive frequent, harassing phone calls from their partner.
Talk about their partner’s temper, jealousy, or possessiveness.
Have very low self-esteem, even if they used to be confident.
Show major personality changes (e.g. an outgoing person becomes withdrawn).
Be depressed, anxious, or suicidal.
Be restricted from seeing family and friends.
Rarely go out in public without their partner.
Have limited access to money, credit cards, or the car.
Have frequent injuries, with the excuse of “accidents.”
Frequently miss work, school, or social occasions, without explanation.
Dress in clothing designed to hide bruises or scars (e.g. wearing long sleeves in the summer or sunglasses indoors).

...if you see these signs, even a slight personality change, please speak up, ask if everything's alright, offer an escape of some sort, be supportive. Sometimes it is the feeling of being trapped or of having nowhere to turn or no other option that allows these situations to escalate. If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation, it is best to stop the cycle or break ties. The sooner the better.
.     Threats, intimidation, denial or blame, isolation, humiliation, and dominance are some of the methods an abuser exerts control over another. It is very difficult to do; but imagine you love someone and they isolate you from friends or work then demean you for some lacking quality, for example: low income, then when confronted about it they blame their stress at a job, or the pressure of trying to support you. In this situation it's easy to think: wait a minute, you are the one didn't want me to go out and work... What the hell. But you love them and so you dismiss the thought. It only gets worse, it's called the cycle of violence. The worst of it is wanting to dismiss it because you love them. Don' dismiss it, you're smart and picking up on warning signs. Believe in yourself and your right as an adult to not be controlled.
.     Again to quote domesticviolence.org: Abuse is not an accident. It does not happen because someone was stressed-out, drinking, or using drugs. Abuse is an intentional act that one person uses in a relationship to control the other. Sometimes the manifestation seems unconscious on the abusers behalf, but abusers have adopted a pattern of abuse so that they can get what they want. Both sides of this equation require a change in patterns of thinking, it seems there's a lot of focus out there on convincing a victim to no longer tolerate or facilitate the behaviour, to get away. 
.     There is another side to this equation I feel needs just as much attention to bring that terrorizing number, help the abusive personalities recover from their pattern of thinking, there's always a peaceful option, it's ok to not get what you want, it's not ok to force your expectations onto another's life. Domestic abuse hotlines can name places where the pattern can be unlearned and broken. Please break the pattern, no one you love deserves that. 

Helpline: 1.800.799.7233(safe)

Wiki: The main goal for treatment for offenders of domestic violence is to minimize the offender’s risk of future domestic violence, whether within the same relationship or a new one. The majority of offender treatment programs are 24–36 weeks in length and are conducted in a group setting. It has been demonstrated that domestic violence offenders maintain a socially acceptable façade to hide abusive behavior, and therefore accountability is the recommended focus of offender treatment programs. Anger management alone has not been shown to be effective in treating domestic violence offenders, as domestic violence is based on power and control and not on problems with regulating anger responses. More productive foci include topics such as recognizing abusive patterns of behavior and re-framing communication skills. Treatment of offenders involves more than the cessation of abusive behaviour; it also requires a great deal of personal change and the construction of a self-image that is separate from former behaviour while still being held accountable for it.

To a specific friend: http://www.pcadv.org/Resources/LocalProgramContacts.pdf
http://www.christineann.net/about/programs-services/offender/male-offender