Anger

Even when you're angry it is very important to remain gracious.
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.     I have found that most of the people I have encountered in my short time rely on what they can immediately sense about a person as a basis by which to read or judge that person. An intelligent person picks up on this idio centric societal truism and uses it to their advantage. I have. When I meet someone, I tell them what is beneficial for them to know about me.
.     It has been very difficult living through the ramping up of the next great depression, even harder being mostly homeless and reliant throughout. I am of the belief that there needs be no shame in being a victim or homeless or poor. But to lead with such facts can be counter-productive when you try to win over new contacts. Most people won't view the information as precluding some epic tale of leadership and resourcefulness. instead they'll write you off like the bum begging for change by the train station.
.     Currently I am coping with a great deal of grief and my outlet of choice for many years has been to share my experiences with a fun and informative moral somewhere in it. It has always been a good thing to learn from the experiences of your elders. So I spend a lot of time with the elderly asking them for advice. I highly recommend the practice. It has taught me to be gracious about the hardships of others. Listen politely, ask how they ever managed to cope.
.     Recently I met someone who seemed genuinely interested in problem solving with me and it became clear to me how angry I am not only with what happened but also with myself for allowing myself to get into the situation where it could have happened again. Let alone my anger at the, we'll say "aggressor" in the situation. But old habits die hard, I could not let on that this was the case. The conversation could have ended two ways and I couldn't help forgoing the sympathetic response for the trickier to procure compliment on how well I handled the situation.
.     So instead of leading with what happened, here's the useful advice, lead with how it is suddenly noticeable how many people have the bad habit of displaying their anger like some badge of honour. Example: we all have that Facebook friend who is always posting some broken hearted girlfriend post. You know the one, it's about how she is strong, better off without, jack-holes aren't worth the time, blah blah blah. And I for one shut out negativity and when conversation allows for it, I hint at how much worse things could be.
.     It is healthy to vent your frustration, don't get me wrong, but it is a fault no matter how you look at it. Grandma had a brother died in the war, what was your problem again? My point is that there's always someone has it worse off and unless whatever the incident was can contend on such a level, it is selfish and small minded to openly express anger. 
.     The bum I had a conversation with at three this morning hasn't had a family since his forties, nor a real conversation since he lost his leg in the accident at the under-the-table job he held three years ago. He wasn't angry. I told him I wasn't either but i couldn't believe his ability to keep going. Eventually I asked him how he did it, but I'll get to that later. Poor thing smelled like he needed a long shower, but at least someone was talking to him for once. 
.     It took a little while but when the bum had said enough to be ok with handing over the spotlight to me; he asked what brought me here. When I told him, he smiled and said that was too bad. I knew what he meant so I asked him again how he did it. He told me that he just couldn't stop breathing by choice anymore. His pause to smirk only lasted a second. He said the sun still shines every damn day and his lungs keep filling' with air all on their own so he might as well try and fill his belly which was work enough in these times.
.     I was grateful. It will be useful information if this shit keeps happening to me.